Zero's Commercials
by Windrises
Summary: Zero has Diethard film some commercials for the Black Knights' new products.


Note: Code Geass is owned by Sunrise.

Lelouch Lamperouge (Zero) and his team, the Black Knights, needed more money to buy equipment for their missions. Zero decided to have him and his sidekicks make a store where they can sell stuff. Zero's teammates were concerned that they wouldn't get much business so Zero decided to have his cameraman, Diethard Ried, film some commercials.

Lelouch got on his Zero costume. He went into the Black Knight's filming studio and danced around the stage where his commercial was being filmed. While dancing he fell to the ground. After spending several minutes recovering Zero tap danced in front of Diethard's filming camera and said, "I've got the ultimate product for the citizens of Japan and Britannia: a geass. You're probably wondering what a geass is. It's one of the coolest things of all time. It's what I use to help me defeat my enemies."

Diethard wasn't approving of Zero's commercial replied, "Cut."

Zero was a little upset about the filming being delayed, because he was impatient. He asked, "What's going on?"

Diethard sighed and said to Zero, "You were standing in the same position the whole time."

Zero appeared frustrated while saying, "When I danced around I crashed to the ground and broke some stuff."

Diethard responded, "You need to make the commercial exciting."

Zero gave Diethard a thumbs up and re-did the start of his dialogue. This time he jumped around. Diethard thought it was too chaotic so he had Zero stop again. Before Zero stopped jumping around he accidentally broke some filming equipment. Zero threw the broken pieces of equipment in the garbage can.

Zero did a ballerina dance on his way back to the commercial filming area. Zero said, "A geass is a device that can hypnotize people into doing whatever you want. Sadly it can only be used once, but you can make a big impact by using the geass. I got my geass from my roommate. Getting a geass used to be really hard, but you can get one by coming to the Black Knights' new mini store which is next to our hideout. It costs fifty thousand dollars per geass. That could seem like a high price, but if you use your geass as cleverly as I did you can make the world a crazier place."

Diethard replied, "Cut."

Zero seemed confused while asking, "Why did you say cut? I finished the commercial. Plus I didn't jump around."

Diethard responded, "The last line isn't really working. Making the world a crazier place isn't a very advertising friendly motto."

Zero said, "But crazy is considered hip." Diethard wanted Zero to change the last line of the commercial so he danced back to the filming area. While using a sentimental sounding voice Zero said, "If you use your geass as cleverly as I did you can make the world a cooler place."

After Zero finished the commercial he jumped to Diethard and asked, "Was my commercial amazing enough?"

Diethard paused and said to Zero, "You are certainly the most charming and cool guy ever, but your commercial skills are of mixed quality."

Zero resisted the urge to stick his tongue out at Diethard while asking, "Are you going to broadcast the commercial?"

Diethard sighed and said, "Yes. I'm going to go start filming the second commercial. Are you going to stay?"

Zero replied, "I need to go protect the fridge. Tamaki's been taking way more sodas than I want him to." Zero started jumping to the fridge.

A few minutes later C. C. arrived at the filming studio. A few of the Black Knights delivered a bathtub and a small oven. C. C. walked up to Diethard and asked, "How did Zero's commercial adventure go?"

Diethard looked a little tired while saying, "I have nothing to say about that."

C. C. smirked and said, "That fits with his name. My commercial is probably going to be better."

C. C. and the Black Knights spent several minutes getting C. C.'s invention ready. Diethard yawned several times, because he gets bored easily. C. C. got changed into a fancy white bathrobe and started her commercial. She said, "Greetings people. There's a lot of things that we're all tired of. One of the biggest things is not being able to bake pizza while doing boring stuff like showering. Thankfully I've come up with a way to take care of that big problem." Diethard rolled his eyes. He didn't have that much confidence in C. C.'s invention, but he was loyal enough to Zero to not complain too much. C. C. pointed to the new pizza oven and said, "I've invented a pizza oven that can be attached to bathtubs. That way you can shower while getting pizza ready." C. C. went into the bathtub. She started getting clean while putting the pizza in the oven. After a short shower the pizza was ready. She said, "It's the ultimate two pack. Get the bathtub/pizza oven set. It only costs seven thousand dollars." Diethard rolled his eyes again, because of how absurd he thought C. C.'s invention was. She responded by having a threatening look on her face.

C. C. walked up to Diethard and said, "It seems like you don't have too much trust in my invention."

Diethard tried to word himself in a way that wouldn't tick C. C. off. He paused for a really long minute and said, "It's really silly. I doubt that lots of people will want to take baths and make lunch at the same time."

C. C. stubbornly said, "I've wanted to do it for years."

Diethard laughed and whispered, "Zero's girlfriend is pathetic." C. C. overheard Diethard and punched him to the ground. Diethard took a nap on the ground while C. C. left.

Several minutes later Diethard woke up. Lloyd Asplund pranced into the filming studio. Even though Lloyd wasn't a member of the Black Knights Zero thought that he had the potential to have a great commercial. Lloyd had a smug smile on his face while saying, "I've made one of the best inventions of all time." Diethard didn't have much trust in Lloyd so he folded his arms.

Lloyd spent a half hour getting his invention ready. After finishing that up Lloyd hopped in front of Diethard's filming camera and said, "People like to dress up like their favorite characters for Halloween. However people should start dressing up like objects. I've invented a Halloween costume based on my favorite food." Lloyd presented a pudding Halloween costume. It was purple and looked more like a generic costume than pudding. Diethard noticed how weak the costume look. He facepalmed while filming Lloyd's commercial. Lloyd said, "My costume also has a device." He pressed the wrists. Pressing the wrists on the pudding costume sprayed out pudding. Lloyd said, "This way you can beat up criminals with pudding and have a snack on Halloween if your neighborhood is too greedy to give you enough candy. My neighborhood is rude enough to not give me that much candy, because I'm not a kid." Diethard thought that Lloyd's commercial was really bad, but his loyalty to Zero's choices was strong enough to not reject Lloyd's work.

A few minutes later Zero returned. He was carrying some twelve packs of soda. He danced to Diethard and asked, "How did C. C. and Lloyd's commercials go?"

Diethard shrugged and said, "It's somewhat good." Despite Diethard's lack of trust in the commercials Zero thought that they would become some of the most famous commercials of all time. A few weeks later the commercials were presented on thousands of TVs. The commercials were made fun of by several people, but they managed to get some customers.

Zero looked at the business they got. He felt so proud of himself that he screamed, "I'm the most successful store owner of all time!"

C. C. replied, "That's not true Zero. We've barely made any money."

Zero was confused so he stubbornly said, "But we've gotten thousands of customers."

C. C. responded, "But the commercials cost so much that we'll probably lose money instead of becoming rich." Despite being the mastermind behind the commercials Zero blamed Diethard for it. He chased after him.


End file.
